Reese's Whipps

Sometimes companies rip off other companies but then make the product better, like what white people did with soul music (see Hall and Oates). Well Reese’s just ripped off the 3 Musketeers bar from the black man that is Mars Inc.

The Reese’s Whipps tastes exactly like if a 3 Musketeers was filled with peanut butter (that was made completely out of icing sugar). It’s so good it’s almost criminal I haven’t seen any ads for this delicious treat. If I could design an ad for it it would basically look something like:

A child gets hit by a speeding car and he's bleeding out badly. He's hemorrhaging. A stranger stops his car and throws 500-600 candy bars at the injured child.

MAN
Won't be needing these anymore.

He then pulls out a Reese's Whipps and drives off at 200 miles an hour straight into a brick wall.

Roll credits/give me my fucking Oscar.
***

Pros:

-All the pb is uniform, no lumps, no air pockets.

-The chocolate casing is thick enough so that I can still tell I’m eating a chocolate bar and not just a fucking brick of pb.

-Unlike a 3 Muskateers, the chocolate casing doesn’t splinter off when you bite into it so you always have the same ratio off chocolate to peanut butter

Cons:

-A little bit tinier than a 3 Muskateers

-Could have added a thin layer of caramel like Mars bars have.


Injured children and speed demons love this shit

Dark Knight x Hershey

I'm a huge fan of Hershey.  I'll always love those Kit Kats, Spoiler knows what I am talking about.  When Hershey began to jazz it up with different variations of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, my life was officially complete.  Reese's Big Cups? Check.  Reese's Peanut Butter Lovers? Check.  Batman Edition Peanut Butter Cups? CHECK! As soon as I heard these were released nationwide, I took myself to the nearest Hershey retailer (aka Target).  There they were.  Someone (ovb dumb) pointed out that the regular version of those Hershey products were available as well, but seriously, I'm paying for pure HYPE.  

• Reese's Bats: Available in Dark Chocolate & Peanut Butter Bats,  Milk Chocolate & Peanut Butter Bats.  I opted for the Milk & Peanut Butter.  Of course they didn't taste any different.  It's similar to buying a pair of shoes that are  sold at Foot Locker versus a pair of sneakers coped at Saint Alfreds, or any sneaker boutique.  Both are essentially the same thing, but the added specialty makes the other meek. The packaging was exciting, and the bat shape, was, well....CUTE.

• Reese's Pieces: Available in same form (Peanut Butter filling, crunchy shell) BUT they are colored in dark blue & black.  I'm not really a fan of Reese's Pieces, but there was no way I wasn't about to cop the 3/3 Hershey's products, not to mention increase my odds of winning a $35g motorcycle.

• Kit Kat Wafer Bar:  I would pin these up in competition to the Bats.  Embossed (love it) with the Bat, and various Dark Knight knick-knack, they also feature  movie facts.
  

All in all, I would say I was impressed.  Good spin on the classics, and did I mention that each version of this candy was available in multiple "Take Home Bags?" No wonder children in America are so obese.  Hershey also created an interactive Dark Knight website, which in my opinion was cooler than the website Pizza Hut created for the film.  I am loving this snack, you better believe I'll be sneaking these babies in when I go see this shit on IMAX.